We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Randomize
