quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
Randomize
