was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
Randomize
