Why are there so many empty soda cans in my room?
You put them in a circle around your bed and said it was the best way to ward of the witches from hocus pocus....then you remembered you needed salt too. I'm assuming you havent gone to the bathroom yet.
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
Randomize
