So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
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