This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
