question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Randomize
