last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
Randomize
