Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Randomize