I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
it's like iHOP with fire
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
Randomize
