Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
Randomize
