If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
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