? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
Randomize
