My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
Randomize
