ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
I think I ordered pizza when I got home. The email said the delivery time was noon today. So if that shit shows up I am the most amazing drunk on the planet.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
The uberlube is also flammable
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
I think I just sharted jello shots
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
