I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
I left my keys in the garlic bread freezer in Publix.
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
It's blow job season.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize
