i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
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