Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
Randomize
