I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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