just come out here and I will go home with you...
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
Randomize
