Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
I need a burrito and a hug.
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize