I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
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