I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
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