Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
Randomize
