he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
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