I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Randomize