Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
Randomize
