This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
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