I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
Randomize
