Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
Dude, seriously, fucking stop introducing me as "Thomas, with the dick piercing." you are the worst wingman ever.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
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