I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
Randomize
