Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
I was lying there too hungover to move when my dog jumped onto my bed and set half a calzone on my pillow. Best. Dog. Ever.
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
Go christen that room with your naked body.
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
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