he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
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