Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
Sacagawea was the original milf.
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
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