I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
