Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Randomize
