Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
Randomize
