The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Randomize
