Make note: the first date is too soon to make the "condoms are only for making balloon animals" joke.
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Randomize
