And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
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