I'm going to rape someone's good day.
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Randomize
