so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
Randomize
