We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
Randomize