So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
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