RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
I need water and some morals
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
