Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
Randomize
