Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
Randomize
