I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
Randomize