Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
Randomize