I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize
