In the future we'll all be gay
I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
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